#effyourinstagramstandards 

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Isn’t Christmas just amazing? All that giving and luscious food. As well as the pretty trees and family time, right?

It’s pretty much rammed in our faces the second Halloween is over. Quickly our Instagram feed switches from the Autumnal pumpkin patches to picture perfect trees that wouldn’t look out of place in Harrods.

The Elf on the shelf. Don’t even get me started on that fucking elf. Who invented that smug little wank? Like we don’t have enough to do as parents in December. Let’s strategically place an Elf every day and take nice pictures. Fuck that I say! I’d rather have a snowball!

We all get so excited about making our families happy and understandably so but I really can’t stand pictures of piles of gifts. I’m sure it’s posted with the best intention but I can’t help how shitty that could make some people feel if they’re feeling the pinch. Also is it really wise to spoil our kids to such an extreme? it’s so easily done but we really need to be mindful that although they are sweet now there’s something particularly unapealling about a spoilt adult with a sense of entitlement.

I saw a post about a Christmas tree and how it was £15 and the lovely lady that posted it thought is was ‘not Instagram worthy’. Is that really What’s important now? Sadly I think it is for a lot of people. The tree was beautiful by the way!

Sometimes I think we get a little bit caught up in making a nice picture and forget to actually enjoy the moment. We all have such high expectations and it’s no surprise really when we’re surrounded by such perfect images.

Let’s not forget for a lot of people Christmas is time for reflection and that often means missing those who are no longer with us. A lot of the time we’re so busy putting on a face for the kids that we forget to allow ourselves to consider our own feelings.

The run up to Christmas is such a big deal it puts so much pressure on that one day. It can end up being a real anticlimax. Letting kids eat what they like and receiving lots of gifts can be confusing and overwhelming so we can hardly blame them for behaving like prized dickheads for most of it.

Last year Joy was tiny, clusterfeeding and colicy so Steve and I took (sober) turns at trying to settle her and ended up eating our stone cold Christmas dinner in front if the TV. Was it terrible? Hell no!  I mean it could have been better but we were together and let face it eating is a something most of us take for granted. Plus we can harp on about it in true parent style when Joy is old enough to care.

Even advent calendars seem to have lost their way. Gin advent calendars costing over £100? Really? I’m all about the cheap chocolate. I love a gin but come on! We seem to be losing our grip on reality here a bit. Or did child benefit go up massively and I missed the memo?

I’m a huge fan of Christmas and like a lot of Mums I let the boys do the tree then rearrange it the second their backs are turned. Although as much a I want it to look nice I really don’t want it to look perfect. We all need to stop striving for perfection or realising that perfect is different for everyone. I’ll certainly be checking out that £15 tree and there the only gin in here this year will be from Aldi. It going to be amazing!

I think we all just need to rewind a bit and enjoy this time of year. Bring back tacky (kitsch) 80s decorations, ignore the pressure and get stocked up on Lidls faux Baileys (£3.75 and amazing by the way!)

Take some lovely pictures but don’t let them get in the way of family time and don’t be disappointed when the kids have a tantrum or Grandad moans about the Queens speech for 3 hours. It’s just one day. Merry Christmas!

#effyourinstagramstandards

Yvonne

Who is she? 

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Hi I’m Yvonne but you’d be forgiven for knowing me as Lewis’ and Joy’s mum or even Steve’s wife. I am all of those things too but firstly I’m Yvonne. I love long hot baths, reading and dancing in the living room with my husband to 90s dance. Im sarcastic to a fault, Im obsessed with beauty products and you won’t catch me wearing a mama jumper. I’m a proud mother and wife but I refuse to be defined by my children or marital status.

After Lewis (my first) I made the mistake a lot of us do. I thought becoming a mother should change me so when I the urge to skip through a meadow singing the sound of music didn’t take me I really thought I’d failed. The urge to have a social life took me and that made me feel even worse. I forced myself to baby signing, baby reflexology and fucking baby shiatsu (honestly that’s a thing ) in a desperate bid to become more like the Julie Andrews character I thought I should be.

It took time and good advice to realise that wasn’t how it had to be. Once I finally allowed myself to see that I was so relieved. Lewis was relieved too as his Mum was now back firmly in her comfort zone and he didn’t have to attend 18 ridiculous classes a week.

I think we’re all guilty of it but we need to take time to remember who we are. I love my children and I take them to classes I think will benefit them and not bore me to tears but I also have a life of my own. I existed before them and once they’ve flown the nest *sobs* I will continue to exist. I know all the nursery rhymes but also I can drink 5 Sambuca shots and recreate the whole video for single ladies- albeit badly.

I’m not offended when people introduce me as a mum or wife. I do it too. On a recent (rare) drink with some friends I introduced my friend as ‘Archies Mum’ and instandly thought shit! She’s not JUST Archies Mum. She’s Jackie. She loves make up, wine and singing Proud Mary. She’s a person too. In her own right and she deserves to be introduced as one.

So what was my point here? Don’t feel guilty for still being who you were before your children. There’s no doubt having children changes you but we are still entitled some escapism once in a while. Get drunk now and again and have sex on the kitchen floor. Whatever works for you! Never apologise for that. Remember who you are and introduce your friends by their name.

Yvonne x

Organic September Roasted plums 

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We all want the best for our kids right? In an ideal world they’d eat all the fruit and vegetables we put down to them but we all know this is easier said than done. We cook a lot in my house and I try to use seasonal as much as possible to keep cost down and to get a nice variety of colours and flavours incorporated.

When I saw the Organix recipe of the month I jumped at the chance to try it and I really wasn’t disappointed. Lewis helped make it and it was a huge hit with the whole family. It felt like such a treat but added to our five a day as well as being rich in nutrients  Win win!

The kids loved it so much that I ended up making more of the oat crumble to have as granola with some natural yoghurt as a nice healthy breakfast.

Here is the recipe for you to try:

Suitable for 12+ Months although can be puréed or mashed for babies over 7 months. Don’t forget no honey under a year though but maple syrup works just as well. 

10 – 30 minutes to prepare

10 – 30 minutes to cook

Serves 2 adults and 2 children

Ingredients:
Roasted plums

3 large plums

Coconut oil (or melted butter) to brush

Almond & oat crumble:

3 tbsp porridge oats (or gluten free oat)

1 tbsp ground almonds (or desiccated coconut if nut allergies)

½ tsp ground cinnamon

1 tbsp melted coconut oil (or butter)

2 tbsp maple syrup (or honey for children over 12 months)

Mascarpone cream:

150g of mascarpone

3 tsp lemon juice

3 tsp maple syrup (or honey for children over 12 months)

¼ tsp vanilla extract

A couple of mint leaves (optional)

How to make

Step 1

Preheat the oven to 200°C/fan 180°C/gas mark 6. Line a baking tray with parchment paper

Step 2

Prepare the crumble by mixing the oats, ground almonds and cinnamon powder together in a small bowl. Add melted coconut oil (or butter) and maple syrup. Stir until you get a crumble texture

Step 3

Spread crumble on baking tray. Bake for 10-15 mins until golden and crisp. Remove from oven and set aside to cool down

Step 4

Put the grill on to 275°C

Step 5

Cut plums in half and remove stones carefully

Step 6

Brush each plum all over with some melted coconut oil (or butter)

Step 7

Arrange plums in an oven proof dish, cut side up

Step 8

Place until the grill for around 5 mins or until the plums soften

Step 9

While the plums are in the oven, mix mascarpone with lemon juice, maple syrup and vanilla extract in a small bowl

Step 10

To serve, dollop the mascarpone cream on a plate. Add 2 halves plum per adult or 1 half plum per child on top of mascarpone cream. Sprinkle with crumble.  Add a couple of mint leaves on top.

organix finger foods are a staple in my changing bag. They’re so handy as an on the go snack and there’s no guilt as Organix comes with a no junk promise. Organix finger foods help little ones discover new shapes, textures and taste while remaining fun and tasty and encouraging junk free, nutritious food.

Organic September: top tips from Organix on why to choose organic for your little one

Just when you and your baby are in a confident routine with milk feeds, along comes the new adventure of introducing solid foods – a time when you want to make the best choices for your growing little one as they start learning about food. So why choose organic?

1. Whether you’re baby led weaning with soft cooked pieces or feeding purees, choosing organic fruit and veggies helps reduce your little one’s exposure to pesticides [organic fruit and veg are grown with fewer pesticides].

2. Fruit and veg are most commonly found to contain more than one pesticide residue, so it makes sense to go organic – apple, pear, banana, and green veg like kale and spinach.

3. In the supermarket choose organic finger foods – then you can be sure you’ll get food you can trust, with no controversial artificial food colours and preservatives, GM ingredients, or hydrogenated fats.

4. From 12 months your little one can have whole cow’s milk – choosing organic means you’ll get more omega-3 fatty acids than non-organic milk [linked to improving children’s brain development].

5. Choosing organic dairy food and drinks also means you’ll avoid the use of GM crops fed to non-organic livestock.

For more information and lots of tasty organic recipes for all the family visit http://www.organix.com

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Let me know if you try this one out and dont forget to tag #organix.

Yvonne x

 

 

Try not to be a dick 

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Once upon a time I was a dick. I didn’t mean to be. Dick is maybe not right…. delusional is probably fairer. 7 years ago I had a baby. Baby Lewis. He was a happy little thing, ate well and slept through the night from about 6 weeks. That actually is a thing. Who knew?

I can almost guarantee a few people already hate me at this point. I don’t blame you really. I wasn’t smug but admittedly I took the credit. He was a good boy and I was clearly born to parent the shit out of life. As soon as I wrote that I realise how fucking smug that actually make me sound. Sorry! Never once did I look down my nose at people who had non sleeping, unsettled babies. I may have been delusional but I’ve never been THAT person.

I suppose I just didn’t really think in all honesty. When you have a child you know your child and their ways and quirks. Other children didn’t really come into it.

When Steve and I decided to try for a baby 6 years later I still didn’t really think. “you never get two the same”. Many an old dear told me but I didn’t really take it in. Who wants two the same anyway? I want my kids to be their own people!

Along came Joy. Our beautiful, sassy Joy. 6 weeks in and she didn’t sleep. Obviously I wasn’t worried as I knew Lewis was in the minority. Fast forward a year and I was starting to realise that sleeping all night wasn’t really Joys thing. That was quite hard for me to accept. It’s easy to think you’ve failed as a parent, especially when you’ve had a ‘textbook’ child first. 16 months in and I know I haven’t failed. Joys thriving, she’s smart, funny and she sure knows her own mind. What more could I ask for? Actually a full nights sleep would be nice but let’s not push it eh?

Joy suffered with colic and reflux. She didn’t settle without a boob in her mouth for 5 months. She was a screamer and we’ve never left her to scream. Judge away! Lewis would wimper for a few minutes at bed then drift off. Joy could scream herself into projectile vomit and that’s just not something I’m willing to let happen.

We co-sleep (mostly) and Joys a complete Mummys girl. Many a time I’ve cooked the dinner with her in the sling and she gets stroked to sleep like the Lady of the manor. That’s what works for her- and us and that’s what we’ll continue to do.

If I had a pound for every time I’ve heard the old “rod for your own back” I wouldn’t need to do a lotto. Funnily enough it mostly comes from people with no children or people who had theirs when dinosaurs still roamed the earth.

I adore both my kids. I don’t always like them but I love them immensely- and equally! They’ve taught me everything I know about parenting and now I know just how different they can be. I’m not a dick anymore and I’m certainly not delusional. You get what you’re given and you love them regardless.

Once you’re an adult no one gives a shit about how much you sleep so I’m not sure why we put so much pressure on babies.

If you’re reading this and you have a Lewis please don’t panic. This isn’t to put anyone off. They are all worth it. I promise! If anything this is to let all the parents with the non sleeping, non settling kids know that they are brilliant. It’s not a reflection on us and we can sleep when we’re dead right? 😉

Yvonne x

Dear Rose… 

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Dear Rose,

I bet you have to think before you even remember me but I often think of you. I don’t think you would have forgotten me although I wouldn’t blame you if you did. You probably see people like me every day. 

You were my health visitor and I was a naive 24 year old with not an ounce of common sense. 

I planned a baby with someone I thought I knew. I really didn’t but the less said about him the better. For the sake of my son. 

So I found myself 24, pregnant and very much alone. That wasn’t my plan. I was angry at that fact for so long. I didn’t want to be that person. Who does? 

You showed me that ‘that person’ could be anyone. Most of all you believed in me when I had zero faith I could make this sorry situation work. You gave me strength and never once looked down at me- and so many others did. 

You made sure I didn’t just make the situation work I fucking rocked it and you made sure I knew I did. Little comments of praise and texts here and there. They were the small things I really needed and I could tell you meant it all.

I genuinly believe there are some truly great people in the world. I’m not talking the Kardashians and all these other ridiculous people were constantly confronted with. Proper role models who make a difference to people’s lives day after day. People like you.

I was at my lowest ebb when I had Lewis. I hid it well as I always do but you saw through that. You supported me through it all like the guardian Angel I needed and you gave me the confidence to continue alone. 

When I moved house I got a new health visitor. I felt a bit sad to be leaving you but by this point I’d met Steve (my now husband) and we were ready to plan another baby. I text you to tell you and as predicted I got the loveliest response. 

My health visitor with Joy is nice. I see so little of her but she seems lovely. I don’t really need her and I just hope she’s spending her time with the people who do need her. Like you did with me. I do hope you guys realise the impact you have on our lives. 

I don’t think I ever got to properly thank you but I hope you know how much I appreciated everything you did for me and I have no doubt that you’re still making a difference to others. You rock Rose! 

Thank you! 

Yvonne (and Lewis) x 

Joanie Clothing 

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Recently I was tagged in a picture by a good friend. It was a bikini she thought I’d like. I’ve never really had myself down as a bikini kinda gal but I did like it. So I took a brave step. I bought it. 

I’m 32 and a size 16. That’s doesn’t really mean anything though with today’s mental sizing. I have some 12s and some 18s. Does anyone know what size they really are? 

I’ve been thinner. Much thinner. Also much bigger too and I have to say I was probably at my most miserable at my thinnest. I was thin but I couldn’t socialise as I’d gain weight. What a the bloody point of having a good figure when you don’t even get to showcase it? 

Anyways I’m over it. Hitting 30 was a turning point for me and I thought f*ck it! life’s too short to not buy the bikini. I have as much right to wear the bikini as anyone else and does anyone really care what I look like? Probably not. 

My body had produced two perfect babies via C section and I had my gallbladder out last year. I have stretch marks and scars but I have respect for the body I have. Its still a work in progress but that’s okay. 

I bought the bikini from Joanie and I’d never even heard of them before so was dubious. I was wrong to be. The bikini is fabulous and I feel fabulous in it. I now own another 2. Don’t tell my husband! 

For me there’s a gap in the market. I often find high street shops either too young or too old for me. I’m over bodycon but I’m not quite ready to hang up my party frocks yet. No one really wants to see me in a bodycon dress but I’m not dead yet so I may as well flaunt what I have. In a way that makes me comfortable. 

Joanie fills that gap for me. They do real clothes for Sizes 8-22 and at a really good price too. They have sexy, quirky, casual and formal and it’s now my go to website. 

The sizes are real and the fabrics are lovely so no more looking like a size 16 sausage squashed into a cheap polyester skin.

The clothes have a vintage feel but there’s both ends of the spectrum on this and if vintage isn’t for you I still think you’d be hard pushed not to find something you like. 

As I wrote this I got a text to say my next Joanie order is coming today so I’ll be sure to post lots of pictures. Again, please don’t tell my husband but if you are reading this it was all in the sale. £6 polka dot palazzo pants anyone? Yes please! 

This isn’t a sponsored post so these are 100% my views on some gorgeous clothes that I paid for. Seriously! Go see for yourself.

https://joanieclothing.com/product-category/dresses/
Yvonne x 

P.S have you ever seen anyone that happy to be in a kids paddling pool? We don’t get much sun in Scotland. Can you tell? 

We are good enough 

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when you hear of postnatal depression what do you think of? For many it’s not bonding with your baby instantly after birth. For me that wasn’t the case. You see it’s different for everyone. There isn’t a right way to suffer PND and there certainly isn’t a wrong way. unfortunately you get the version you’re given.

For me I’ve been treated about a year after both my kids. Looking back it reared its head immediately but I soldiered on. I don’t know who I was trying to kid.

The stigma is still there with any mental health issues. People are frightened to speak up for fear of being judged. When you’re already feeling like you’re not good enough the last thing you need is others thinking it too.

I instantly bonded with both my children and it was love at first sight for me. weirdly the case for me- as it is for most is I love them… a bit too much.

Newborns scare me. The anxiety they give me drives me insane. I love the squishy, pink, milky bundles but what about all the other stuff they come with? For example cot death statistics, how much they should be eating, pooing and bloody peeing! Anything I can worry about I would.

When I had my first I slept with the windows locked in a first floor flat all summer. For fear someone would come and take my baby. I called my Nan once to ask her to look after the baby while I had a shower. She suggested I left him to sleep while I showered and I genuinely couldn’t believe she would suggest something so absurd.

When I had Joy, my second I stayed awake for 3 whole days. Even when she slept. For fear of something happening to her if I slept. Of course that didn’t last and I eventually passed out with exhaustion.

Second time round it’s much easier to spot though and  luckily I’m surrounded by love and support. I’m now very good at asking for help if I need it now and I’m aware of the importance of self care. We all need to look after ourselves first. You can’t pour from an empty cup.

The more we talk about these issues the more we educate others. If we normalize talking about mental health then we put people at ease and eliminate ignorance.

My point? Keep talking. If unsure ask questions. Never be ashamed and make sure you have a good GP who understands what’s going on. I can’t stress that enough. These issues are often easily resolved but only once treated. Either it be with counselling, drugs or maybe both. Whatever works for you.

Try not to put too much pressure on yourself. We’re all guilty of it. Some days I can clean the whole house, have 2 playdates, make the dinner and do a food shop. Other days I stay in Pjs and that’s okay too. It’s about balance.

I’ll say it again. Keep talking!

I’ve posted some links below that may be helpful:

http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Postnataldepression/Pages/Introduction.aspx
http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/Anxiety/Pages/Introduction.aspx
https://insighttimer.com/
Yvonne x

Mothering without a mother 

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Recently I’ve seen an influx of Facebook posts about always loving your mother as you never get another. Even when you dont see eye to eye. This may be very true but for some sadly it isn’t this black and white. 

My Mum isn’t dead. Not my biological one anyway. My Nan raised me and she was my ‘real’ Mum and sadly she’s no longer with us. My Biological Mum isn’t part of my life however and won’t ever be. 

I won’t go into it as I have no urge to publicly slate her and have younger siblings I wouldn’t want to hurt. 

She hasn’t met Joy and hasn’t seen Lewis in years. It isn’t a fallout or an argument situation but for the sake of my mental health she will remain an outsider. I wish her well. 

Do I love her? Yes! Am I sad I don’t have a mother around? Of course! This really is the best decision all round and I’ve made peace with that. That has taken a long time but I really have made peace with it. 

That doesn’t mean I don’t get a pang of upset when I see friends Mum’s coo over their gorgeous grandchildren. Or when I’m ill and I could really use a cuddle. You’re really never too old to want your Mum at times. 

I do love it when I see my friends with good relationships with their Mums. Over the years a few of them have played a Mum role to me and that’s helped me build a picture of the type of mother I want to be. 

Having Joy was bittersweet. My Nan died when I was pregnant and to not have a mother to show of my baby too… bloody hurt. I still look at my kids and think ‘wow! I made this!’ I just wish I had my Nan here to gush to at times. 

I’m fiercely independent and this is probably why. It’s a defence mechanism. I’ve not always had the choice. I’ve just had to crack on with it. 

The one good thing to come from the situation is my relationship with my children. I’ll always put them first, do my best to never let them down and love them with every part of me. 

I have a great support network and I’m so grateful. My Auntie Helen, my siblings, my friends, my cousins, my mother in law and obviously my husband. Having a big family does have its perks- sometimes! 

I’m not angry or sad at these Facebook posts. It’s a copy and paste type thing and people are more than entitled to celebrate anyone in their life that they wish. So long as we’re mindful it isn’t the same for everyone. I hope one day my kids can celebrate me in that way. Maybe even throw in a wee afternoon tea. 

If you have your Mum in your life then give her a kiss from me. This mothering lark isn’t easy but a kiss from your child always helps. 

Yvonne x 

 

Life after death

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IMG_20160202_193038Recently I’ve suffered a loss. I hate that stupid term. She’s not lost is she? she’s dead. My dearest Nana. Who raised me along with my Grandad so they were my parents.

My Grandad died almost 4 years ago and that was the first death I’d had to deal with. Quite lucky that I’d got to 26 and not had someone close die. Not so bloody lucky it was my Grandad. I didn’t deal with that very well. I didn’t really deal with it at all truth be told. I’m not the best with feelings to be honest. So I swept it under the carpet and acted like a fool mostly. Then boom. One day about 2 and a half years ago I though right. Let’s do this. I had some short term counselling. How American does that sound? No offence to any Americans mind. I was dubious but it really helped. So much so that I recommend it to anyone who mentions so much as a headache to me. It’s not for everyone but it done the trick for me. I’m not over it. Of course not but I can speak about it and be happy and also be upset like a normal person. There are so many memories I have. All good. Worth having and not sweeping under a carpet. I miss my Grandad every day. He was poorly and he was ready to go. None of us wanted him to but that wasn’t for us to decide sadly.

My Nana coped so well. She was a tough bird. A bit like myself and not the most open with feelings of sadness but she was affectionate and loving with me always. I told her everything- like everything. She wasn’t a prude. Raising me made sure had no choice and she loved a grotty conversation almost as much as she loved Jeremy Kyle. She often heard things and asked me to explain. Ever explained sexting to and 80 year old? Nice eh?

She was so full of life and she didn’t want to die. Absolutely not and I was not ready for her to go. She found out she had cancer just before my wedding and was so upset in case she ruined my big day. So selfless but she fought it off quicker than most deal with a common cold. She was really remarkable.

Recently she had been ill with some stomach issues. Nothing serious she was told but it went on too long. I was starting to panic and kept at her to get to the hospital. They did tests and tests and kept saying it would just go. I think she knew it wasn’t a bug. I did but I’m a pessimistic bugger. The next thing she was in hospital. Within 24 hours she was gone. I won’t go into the details as it’s a bit much. One day she had a bug and the next she was gone. I’d joked with her a few weeks prior that she better not dare die while I’m pregnant and she did. The cheek of it? She had a bit of a sick sense of humour, like me and our banter was something many could never understand. I didn’t want them too, it was ours.

That was 2 months ago nearly. It feels like ages ago and 5 minutes ago all at the same time. This time though I made a promise to myself. To grieve and I did, and I am. Someone and I wish I could remember who told me to “be kind to myself”. I’m was 24 weeks pregnant and the time and that made perfect sense. I took time off and by God did I need it? After my Grandad died I went right back to work and that was the worst move ever. I wasn’t doing that again. I didn’t just have myself to think about but a baby as well as a 6 year old and a husband too.

L and my Nan had a truly beautiful bond. They adored each other. She said to me just before Christmas that when she did die I’d have my own feelings to deal with and his. Imagine pointing that out eh? She was right though. I feel terrible for him. He forgets and he’s confused, but generally he’s OK.  It’s amazing how resilient kids are and he’s a happy go lucky wee soul so he content thinking she’s watching over him and goes to the cemetery to talk about what he’s been  up to that week. His attitude always helps as he’s mostly so accepting. There have been times he’s just insisted on going to see her and got angry that he can’t see her or have a two way conversation with her. I know how he feels and that’s the worst bit.

She wouldn’t want sadness or anger at all and that’s what keeps me going. I’m also mostly ok but there are the days the even getting out of bed is an issue and not just cos of the growing bump. I’m being kind to myself as advised and some days I think wow! I’ve done loads and I am supermum and others I think shit all I did was put on some clothes, but those days I’m still like “well done you!”. It’s the little things. I’m doing my best and that’s fine.

Check me? Taking loads of credit for how well I’m doing. Truth is without my friends and family I wouldn’t have at all. My husband is pretty amazing. He’s much better with words and feelings than me. We’re a bit like my Grandparents in that sense. He’s my biggest supporter and backs me up always. We really are a team and recently he’s stepped up while I’ve quite often been just useless. He’s forced me to take time, take it easy and sometimes eat cake for breakfast. He doesn’t judge at all and for all I’m shit at talking I can always talk to him and he always listens. This is more cringey than I’m used to but I couldn’t have done any of this without him. I mean just keeping on.

I’ve went off on so many tangents and what I’m really trying to say is that it does get easier. Then you have one shitty day and it feels like it doesn’t, but it does. Life goes on and I really hate that saying. So blasé and cliché and probably other words that end in é like dické. It does though whether we like it or not. I really am OK too and it’s nice to be able to say that. I’m coping and I’m looking forward to so many nice things. It’s terrible my Grandparents aren’t here but I am just so grateful for the years I did have and that will never go away.

Hopefully my Nan can tell my Grandad that I’m happy and settled. He would love that and that pleases me.

I didn’t want this to be sad and I really hope it’s not. I’m happy as I type and I’m sorry if it seems at all self pitying but I’m also not sorry. I suppose it’s just nice to write this down. Therapeutic almost (here I go again with the Americanisms).

As they say in showbiz: The show must go on.

Yvonne x

 

 

Think before you compare

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Social media is everything now isn’t it? Surely everyone knows it isn’t really life though? Or do they? I think we’re all guilty of looking at someone’s pictures on Instagram or Facebook and feeling a bit envious but we need to think about the bigger picture.

They amount of lovely pictures I share of my family having a great time is nice. It doesn’t show my son complaining about not wanting to go outside as he’d rather play xbox though. Or my pregnancy ailments making it such a struggle to even walk to the car.

We tend to paint an idealistic picture and that’s normal but I do think we need to be aware of this. The grass isn’t always greener, so water your own grass and stop worrying about other people’s. The person you may envy for always being out sipping fancy cocktails may well be envious of our family life and would do anything for a child (however whingey). You just don’t know. We all have a story and we don’t always want to tell it.

My life is far from perfect. My son misbehaves and I shout (a lot). I use so much profanity in everyday life I should have been a sailor and mother earth I am not. I’m messy and love a good drink. My husband and I argue like normal people but luckily he see I’m usually right and it’s all good (chances right?).

We post nice pictures as when we look it’s the nice things we remember. Who wants to remember the time your kid pissed everywhere? Or broke the TV with buzz lightyear? Not me, although sadly the Buzz fiasco will always haunt me. I’ve never forgiven Buzz for that. My son is now in the clear though.  Just.

The moral of the story is: Be thankful for what you have and be happy for other people. Easier said than done eh? Unfollow people you don’t like too. That’s not good for anyone.

Yvonne x